If one was to do a world wide poll on relationships, and why certain people stay togather, how many are truly happy, and what couples and how many are really in love, have never cheated, how honest do you think everyone would be, and don't you think w/todays standards it would be quite depressing? Out in public, I watch people togather. Some seem really into each other. They are more than likely on drugs, alcohol or both. In a new relationship, or are a private "side" item out on the town. Very few I'd be willing to bet, are deeply in love, have been for years, and will stay togather until death. You have celebrities who almost think of love as a game, or a way to make a living from their settlements, and w/the exception of very few, stay togather from 1 week to a few years. There are those who love their spouse, but cheat for various reasons, and have no qualms unless they are caught. There are those of us who stay togather for a time, just for the sake of our children, or until they are grown. (I fall under this catagory, but have decided not to anymore) Some stay togather out of pure greed. They do not want to share what they have in a costly settlement, so they hate each other w/a passion their love never had, and put up w/it. I thonk it would be a very depressing poll to read, if it was in fact done, and in all honesty.

Alot more couples are into anal sex than there used to be, or at least it's discussed alot more. Just though I'd give one womans perspective on this "touchy" subject. I've been in 3 major relationships to where we explored alot in sexual areas. This subject came up in all three. W/the first one, I just thought "no way"! This guy has gay tendencies, or something. W/the second, I agreed to try it, did once, and NEVER again. In my current relationship however, he went about it in a totally different way, and it's become something we both enjoy from time, to time. It's something we work up to each time, and he keeps me very relaxed, which is a major key to the enjoyment on my part. It always hurts somewhat (during, and the next day especially) but that in itself can be part of the turn-on. (for me anyway) It's a nice thing to do every once in awhile just to spice things up, so to speak. We watched a very good "how to" video before we got started on this adventure that was VERY informative. I would strongly advise any man trying to get his woman to comply w/this to try that tactic. It really helped w/me. My man also brings a little anal play into oral sex, which brings me to climax in nothing flat. It's fun sometimes just to play that way, w/out going there completely. I'm glad it's something we explored, and continue to do.

I was thinking about men and women, and started to wonder who really benefits the most (of the two) in a longterm relationship. When it comes to health issues, they say men live longer, healthier lives when they are in one. Why is that I wonder? Is it because they are cared for by a woman that loves them, and takes the load off of them when it comes to everyday issues? For example; cooking, cleaning, scheduling appts., running errands, to just plain old taking care of them when they are sick? I could definately see this being the case if we went back in time to even 30 years ago, but now alot of men (not all) do alot of these things to help out their working spouse. What if the woman is not the type that does these things, then who benefits more? Is it her because things are in fact different in the household than they used to be, and not only does she have help at home, but has outside outlets as well? For example; working, going out w/her friends, and being able to have a voice in matters that her Grandmother never had? I think this is something that varies from couple, to couple. Everyone is different, and sees not only their role differently in their home, has their own ideals on "who does what". In my relationship, we both benefit evenly. I'm a writer who is working on two books that are not finished. I stay home w/the children, do all of the cooking, cleaning, and errands. He "brings home the bacon", that allows me to pursue my career as a writer. I'm a southern gal, w/old southern values, that waits on my man. Meaning I fix his plate, and bring it to him for every meal, lay his clothes out for him, and run his errands so he does'nt have to deal w/that after he works all day. He's very involved w/our children, and gives me time and space when I need it. In my eyes, we both benefit.

It seems to me that this title descibes not only my current relationship, but past ones as well, and alot of what friends have been through. You get togather w/someone, and everything is great. You are deeply in love, or so it seems. Then one, or the other starts backing away, doing things that bothers, or hurts the other. Then, at some point there is a switch. By that time (alot of times) the other person has ceased to care as much, so the "switch" does'nt mean much, if anything.BUT... sometimes this is just what the other person has been waiting for, and you feel like this relationship might in fact "survive". I know love is supposed to be anything but easy, and that it goes through phases. It's just to bad what we invision and what really happens, are two very separate things and alot of people just give up. I find myself wondering just how many have gave up to soon, and what they lost because of it. I do have my regrets, but find myself glad I hung in there.

I've never understood "being jealous". There is no woman on this earth I'm jealous of. I'm very comfy in the skin I'm in, and to be honest, if I have ever felt what may well have been the pangs of jealousy, it was of someones heart. Not what they looked like, or what they have. I hear my friends talking about being jealous when the man in their life looks at another woman. Whats the big deal, really? Are'nt they the ones who have him, sleep w/him, and hear his proffession of love? I find it in bad taste if it's carried to extremes, (like someone turning around to get a better look while w/the one they love, or going on and on about how good someone looks to them) but I still don't understand the complete waste of time and energy this emotion provokes. In my case, my boyfriend ALWAYS controls the TV remote when he's home. If there's a sexy woman on some show or commercial, he'll watch BUT.. let their be some show w/sexy men on it, or some actor he knows I like, and he'll flip that channel before you can bat your eyes! If there's a show I like to watch, he says it's because I think someones "hot" on it. When I'm out w/him, I'm very privy to his feelings, and make sure I don't stare at other men, and I save my comments on sexy men for my time w/the girls. I HATE jealousy, is it because I'm not?